So I just told my dad what happened thursday night. He's pretty sure that someone put something in my drink. Because I blacked out for a period of time and when I was able to breathe fresh air I snapped right out of it. He said that there is a form of ruffie that does that. So yeah, thats pretty scary.

I'm searching thru my head trying to figure out who I left my drink with and who I was around. The last person I was around was the patient.. the 55 year old man that said he had a crush on me since he met me at the chiropractors office and he bought me shots and beers. I did walk away from him a few times. He had the opportunity.

Do I think a retired cop would do that? I honestly dont know. I have too much faith in people and dont think anyone would ever do that to me. I guess it just goes to show that I need to protect myself more and pay more attention to whats going on.

This is scary. Its like I was violated in a place that I felt safe. Ive always felt so safe there. I know so many people there. I am friends with a ton of the staff. And the normal bouncer watches over me like a hawk. He wasnt there thursday night. Its just scary.

Thank god I had Bryan and James there and that they watched over me and kept me from getting hurt or going home with anyone else. If they werent there then who knows what might have happened.

Its too weird and scary to think about. I just have a lot to think about now and a lot to deal with and get thru on my own. I know I dont need to drink that much. I need self control before something really awful happens. It just sucks that something bad has to happen for you to realize this.